Review: Covington-opoly

You may have seen knock-offs of Monopoly before, but this is a licensed version, based on the city I was born and raised in, Covington, KY. Every time I go back to Covington I think to myself, damn, this place gets worse each and every time. I blame a lot of it on city government, which has gone out of their way to do nothing for the people trying to make it a decent place to live, but have instead handed money over to people who want to buy properties at ridiculously low rates, flip them, and then charge so much that no one from the city can afford to live in them. 

The game is the same way. It's the same Monopoly, only they've replaced properties with real ones from Covington. Some are historic places, but the "well known landmarks" are businesses that have been there for a few years, no one from the city uses them, or even knows they exist, and I'm pretty sure paid for them like an advertising spot. If you want a real Covington version of Monopoly, 3 of the 4 sides should be abandoned houses, drug and prostitution apartments, or vacant lots, you should lose money every time you pass go, and there would be no Chance cards. 

Covington-opoly represents all of the transplants that have taken over select neighborhoods of the city. Basically, they weren't high enough on the social ladder in their neighborhood because they didn't make enough money, so instead they moved as close to the business district as possible, investing in business opportunities for others like them, so that they can be the new rich people in town. If you loved Covington so much you would wipe that stupid smile off your face and not insult us with your North Face jacket and expensive running shoes. Get lost. 

 Yes, someone really makes these postcards.