I am current on The Walking Dead and American Horror Story,
as well as squeezing in two episodes of Constantine, which could be fun, but I
doubt it will go beyond one season on a major network. I also completed both
this challenge and the Shortober Challenge, which was 31 horror shorts, 16
first time views, all under the 50 minute mark. The one I liked the best and an
honorable mention are covered below. Spoilers in the Thoughts section.
Shivers (1975)
Plot: Scientists
work on a parasite that’s supposed to be beneficial to man, but instead turns
everything into Night of the Creeps.
Thoughts: Night
of the Creeps did it with aliens and really cool looking slugs. Speaking of
which, I never saw the remake/rip-off of that one. The story follows around a
bunch of rich people and the chaos they caused by proxy. Their safe haven among
the other residents of the building is now in jeopardy due to the critters that
want to nest in your intestines. The overall message is that no one is safe,
even if you are rich, when man tampers with the natural order of things. A lot
of 70’s films have a certain level of competence about them, usually the acting
and directing, because money wasn’t as disposable back then, so you needed to
make everything count. Luckily, this film was helmed by a young David
Cronenberg, who more or less mastered body horror in his sleep, but this was
his first feature and he does well.
Verdict: This is
a pretty easy watch and a nice period piece, with no shortage of nudity and
super hot 70’s women. You also get to see why Cronenberg became a household
name, at least amongst the weird people who adore his work.
Detention (2011)
Plot: A killer is
on the loose and imitating a slasher film, so it’s up to a fallen-from-grace
student to investigate, put a stop to it, and prevent a horrible incident from
happening, by going back in time.
Thoughts: Yeah, I
didn’t make that up. Few people liked this horror comedy, and honestly, I can
see why. The writing seems aimed at the younger generation, but it promises
enough gore to please veterans. This combination doesn’t work for most, so
instead of getting Tucker and Dale, you wind up with Not Another Teen Movie,
only with more blood. Not to say I didn’t care for it, and to be honest, as
ridiculous as it got, I still found it somewhat enjoyable, but it’s not really
clear what it wants to be, especially once we start going back in time. The
writing was all over the place, but the stock characters were fun, even though
we were given plenty of flashbacks to flesh them out individually. Yeah, a lot
of conveniences were thrown in for good measure, but the impossible was
possible here, so why not?
Verdict:
Certainly and ADHD film and not one you want to think too much on, but if you
partake in recreational drugs, you’d probably enjoy it a lot.
Wolfcop (2014)
Plot: A weird
cult abducts a cop and performs a lycanthropy ritual on him, only he’s better
suited for the beast than they had planned.
Thoughts: When a
movie is ridiculous, you need to have the proper characters harness it. This did
just that. The was actually a straightforward detective narrative, mixed in
with some good werewolf and shape shifting fun. WolfCop was just average Joe,
until one day, and the people around him played along, helping him all the way.
But then he’s crossed, set-up, and betrayed, so it’s only a matter of time
before the perps get slayed. See, this film makes you want to break into
old-school hip hop lyrics for no reason. But this film has everything you could
possibly want out of a horror comedy. The effects are not spectacular, but
they’re not cheap, and they’re traditional. The acting is on par with the
delivery. The story itself is well-written, as retro as the rest of it, and
somewhat makes sense. The puns are perfectly bad. The anti-hero here is a perfect,
down on his luck, alcohol-swilling badass when he needs to be, and a horrendous
beast when he has to.
Verdict: Please
give us more WolfCop.
The Burning (1981)
Plot: After being
horrendously burned, a man returns to take vengeance on the same camp he was
once a part of.
Thoughts: I saw
this as a kid, but barely remembered it. At the time, it was very fashionable
to have low budget slasher films set at summer camps. I never went to summer
camp, but certainly went camping and enjoyed it. I felt relieved that I did the
latter with my parents, instead of being the next victim amongst a bunch of
mean kids. It’s very obvious that so many filmmakers in the late 70’s and early
80’s were targets of bullying and abuse, so what better way to crank out a
killer to make the others pay. Had we been a society of victims back then,
imagine the lawsuits when someone saw a very similar character to themselves
being slaughtered on screen. But that certainly beast the current wave of high
school shooters. While this one isn’t that original, it somehow stands out
because the characters are so good. For starters, you have Jason Alexander as
one of the cooler kids, before he would eventually move on to be laughed at on
Seinfeld. Leah Ayres is a strong, female character that makes you wonder why
her career didn’t go much beyond Bloodsport. And besides Holly Hunter, you have
a slew of familiar faces you’ll recognize as they pop up. Let’s not forget that
this is based on the Cropsy urban legend, which I’m sure had an impact on the New
Yorkers who would go on to see it and spread the good word.
Verdict: This is
a slasher just as good as all the other ones coming out at the time, but it
somehow gets forgotten. If you’re a fan of early Friday the 13th, this is
actually better, despite lacking the iconic villain. It’s a must see film if
you’re going to pretend you’re somebody in the world of horror fans.
The Taking of
Deborah Logan (2014)
Plot: While
documenting a patient with Alzheimer’s, a film crew uncovers something much
more sinister behind the veil: an old switchboard that communicates with evil.
Thoughts: Okay, I
slightly exaggerated there. Let me get the negative out of the way first. This
film borrows heavily from standard possession films, primarily Exorcist III
with the old and infirm angle, and honestly doesn’t bring much to the table.
That being said, it’s actually scary. It’s hard to make horror fans jump,
because they’re nearly immune to it (yet complain about jump-scares, which are
more effective than other methods,) but this one had me a bit anxious at times
and worried for everyone involved. A woman gets a disease and luckily a film crew
want to document it and pay them to do so. Gavin, Luis, and Mia play a good
documentary team. They’re not really stock characters, show genuine concern for
their subjects, and most importantly are not afraid to tuck tail and run when everything
gets creepy. Deborah plays the old, independent and important woman, now
suffering and being cared for by her daughter, Sarah, and they genuinely seem like
family. But most importantly is the 5 strong females that overshadow the males,
but without making them incompetent or pointless. The film chronicles the
female struggle in the absence of men. Deborah’s husband died. They elude to
Sarah being a lesbian and sticking out the strong struggle with her mom. Mia is
the leader of the documentary crew and reinforces their courage, making them
stick around. The doctor is unwavering with her medical opinion. The sheriff,
not afraid to try and cool the situation with words instead of bullets. This goes
against the weaker males. Gavin realizes this is out of his league and bails on
us. The old neighborly friend sees no other way to protect a family secret than
to suffocate the old woman at her command, but cannot stop her. The security
guards cannot stop her, either. The anthropologist doesn’t offer his services
beyond telling them what they need to do. Also, take note of a male murderer,
who forces a woman to do his final deed, after she cheated him out of it
initially. Although the females are written in a more heroic light than the
males, it doesn’t mean the decisions they make are the correct ones. Gavin was
right to leave. The Sheriff was wrong to try and reason with the possessed Deb.
There are real consequences here. The abduction was intense and the abandoned
cave scene claustrophobic. The ending wasn’t weak, so much as cliché, but
overall it was a pleasant surprise and decent way to end the challenge.
Verdict: This is
solid horror and something you don’t want to miss on Netflix.
Luna (2013)
(Short)
Plot: A girl sees
her family murdered and must survive long enough to get away.
Thoughts: This
short plays out the typical murder my family scenario, but ends with, wait for
it, the sheriff intervening, killing the murderer, only to discover he was
using silver bullets… see where I’m going?
Verdict: This was
my favorite short from this year. I like my shorts short. It unfolds and leaves
you with the oh, shits.
Herbert White
(2010) (Short)
Plot: A man…
likes to visit… a specific place in the woods… for specific reasons…
Thoughts: It’s
difficult to give you a plot without spoiling it. Vice said it best when they
wrote the headline, “Watch Michael Shannon fuck a corpse.” I watched this as
soon as I heard about it. It’s weird, creepy, unsettling, and probably very
realistic.
Verdict: I wanted
to mention this one because it’s so well done, stars Kentucky Mafia member,
Michael Shannon, and it was released years ago, yet I had never heard of it.