Your Comfort Animal Isn’t a Service Animal

I once went to a play at my university with a couple of friends, one of which was blind. He had a black lab seeing-eye dog named Chicago. He wasn’t a perfect seeing-eye dog, perked up at the first sign of treats, fell asleep and drooled on people’s feet in class, and occasionally walked my friend to the wrong building. Of course, he’s already doing a better job than the majority of people who work in the food industry. So right before this play, we walked into a large hall where everyone was socializing, including an older-lady with poorly cut grey hair, sat in one of those wheel-chair scooter things. She was telling a friend of hers how it’s ridiculous places won’t hire her for less than 20 hours a week and she can’t work 4 hours a day every day because she’s disabled. She also had a comfort animal with her, a mutt that kept staring at Chicago, and eventually started barking, because Mrs. Silver Mullet can’t work 2 hours a day and then socialize her comfort animal. She yanked her dog with every bit of strength an able-bodied employed person would use, and told her friend she was taking him to the van. 

I hated this lady. Three strikes against her. I know people with no arms and legs who would bob up and down in the water with a flashlight to signal boats if you’d let them, and here you have some lazy bitch pretending she can’t walk AND that she needs a comfort animal everywhere she goes, including her extended van with an elevator, kennel, and lava lamp, paid for by the government. Now as I’ve said before, I have no problem with the disabled. In fact, I was born with ADHD, and have a host of other medical conditions that make life difficult at times. No comfort animal. No wheelchair. No van. Why? I don’t actually need any of those things, unlike the millions of people who actually do, and don’t abuse the system. I’m not saying everyone with a comfort animal doesn’t have a legit medical reason for needing the animal. With those people, I have no quarrel. But there comes a time when you accept you’re lazy or just like animals, and you leave them at home when you go to places where people don’t need to bring animals. 

In short, service animals do a service, like aid and assist police and firemen, and sometimes die in the line of that duty, while some comfort animals are just an extension of you being a little bitch. 

Does more in 20 hours than the lady this 

article is about does in 20 years; no dog.