You know, you can have your own opinion on a film if you’d
like. The problem is it caters to a group of writers who work for newspapers
and magazines, professional critics if you will. As soon as someone becomes a
critic, they instantly go into douchebag mode. It’s no secret that fans of
horror movies, real fans and not people who only collect the Saw series, specifically
go to horror websites for reviews on films to avoid these mainstream,
pretentious snobs who have by and large never been laid, and have decided to
take their hatred out on everything with blood in it that’s not a vagina.
Probably Freudian. That being said, reviews are now back because I’m sick and
tired of everyone touting Rotten Tomatoes like they’re the authority on film;
they’re not. They do not follow the golden rule of anti-social film viewing: It’s
not worth watching unless someone dies in it. Only then should a film be
reviewed and they have long broken that rule, so I thought it befitting that I
bring back my own opinions for my own writing pleasure.
This also includes reviews on everything else, from music to
blind dates, but not Rotten Tomatoes.
Who's rotten now, bitch?